Friday, September 5, 2014

***This is My Religion*** !!!! What's Yours ???

!!!  This is My Religion  !!! 
  ???  What's Yours   ???

*Hindus, Muslims, Sikhs, Christians* -- Who are they ? I don't know coz I don't belong any of them.

You Wanna know Who I Am , What religion i belong to ? - I'm Human , my only religion is Humanity. I don't belong to people neither i belong to their created so called Religions- The religions they made for their own interest , for their selfishness, their self-serving, to mislead and misdirect others.

My acts for everyone's happiness, well-being and fight against evil is my God, NOT a Scripture, Book or centuries back written fantasies or stories on which people have blind faith even they teach cruelty, hypocrisy, brutality, harshness, discrimination or self-obsession.

I don't think God writes behind his name any of these : "God Sharma" , "God Abdullah", "God Singh" or "God Smith", neither I do. Today people like to know each other, come close to each other,  love each other on the basis of religions and castes only. A  person who belongs to one's religion, is never preferred by other religion even if that person is better than any one else. People prefer the one from their religion no matter how bad he/she is. Once i was having a conversation with someone and he was explaining me that they prefer to select the person having bad qualities but of their own community/religion rather than a person having good qualities but of different religion.
WOW !! That's the world we're living in. We're calling ourselves Humans. Are we really Humans ?? I don't think so !!!

"We're youth, we're the future, we can make this world and our lives better than before !!!", this is the thinking of today's youngsters. Nice Haan !!! I like that........  But are they really on this path ? Again, "I don't think so". They have in their mind that Religionism or Casteism is one of the evil in the society but when they try to go against it then their own people, their family, their parents, everyone start putting them off. I remember when one of my friend's parents emotionally blackmailed her so that she can understand that she can't love or marry a guy of different religion.

"How can you do this to us ? How can you forget you belong to ****** religion, and that guy is of ******** religion ? How come it didn't come in your mind that how our people will react on this, that we will not be able to step outside our home ? What face we will show to our people, our community our society ? You should atleast thought about the religions once , before falling in love !!
Either you leave the guy or kill us or we'll commit suicide. If anything happen to us the only reason will be you. If we had any idea that you will bring this to us , we would have definitely killed you at the time of your birth. You made us ashamed !!!!!"

WOW !!! when parents talk like this there are very few , yeah i mean very FEW children who can stand against them. But story didn't end up here, you know what , my friend was the one who stood up against these threats and then what happened, Strategy #2.

"You know what our religion says - It is a sin to marry or love a guy of another religion. You know what mistake you have done, God will definitely punish you for this as it is written in our religion. If any girl marries a boy of other religion than she will not get a place in Heavan and not even in Hell. Let us tell you what exactly our religion says and why is it superior than any other religion. Blah ! blah ! blah!", and this was enough to brainwash her.

Yeah, Strategy #2 worked. Parents sometimes are not right and they make their children to start thinking in that way too. She was brain-washed. And she is now one of them who thinks her religion is superior than anything else and she now says tat her religion dosn't allow the guy of another religion to step inside her life b'coz he doesn't deserve it. Unfortunate and Pity. And once again Religion won against Humanity, Love and Loyalty.

God never send us on this planet on the basis of religion, HE doesn't know what religion is , coz thats what people created not HIM. HE created us and we created boundaries, castes, religions, self -serving beliefs. HE sent us on this planet as Humans only, but we had converted ourselves to labels - verma, khan, jones, davis, singh etc.

I don't need to go to Mandir, Masjid, Gurudwara or Church to worship God or to find peace. When i see smile on someone's face just b'coz of me that moment makes me feel i worshipped my God, that place becomes a holy place for me and that gives me happiness and peace.

I know i'm not immortal, i have to die one day, i'm also the one like others whose last breathe is reserved, so why i fear of anything. This is my life, i know what i have to do , i know what makes me feel happy and also what makes other feel happy. This whole life is mine, this whole planet is mine, everything in this world is mine till i'm here. Nothing can stop me , no body can bind me. I'm independent soul, i love people not religions and not those beliefs that separates people. Even if my parents think there is a religion that one should keep in mind before loving each other then they need to change their thinking, NOT me. Not always elders are right , sometimes they need to upgrade their out-dated thinking, and only we are responsible for this. Its our responsibility to make them good Human beings rather than a so called Bourgeois Religious person. God is not in a  (self-serving, self-obsessed, self-interested, egoistic, self-seeking, erring, mis-leading, mis-directing) religion or beliefs , HE is within us. Look inside you, always do good and always fight against evil -the bad things, always love without conditions and without any fear, that's what God do and wants us to do, God is not in religions its within You, and thats True.

You're now actually thinking of my Religion ????

My Name is AMAN - the name that every religion has whether they call it as  AMAN Sharma, AMAN'deep Singh, AMAN Siddiqui or Christians usually call AMEN. But I'm not any one of them.

And I will always be like this , no self-seeking religion can bind me.

I'm Just A'Human - A'man  

And here's my full name -- Seraph Aman- The One

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

What's Inside ??

Hey frndzz,  

Today , i just wanna share you or you can say 'ask' you a question that comes in my mind 2 days back when i saw a movie named 'Delhi Belly'. Almost every person whom i met these last two days, who saw this movie, is giving quite positive response. Continuous positive reviews made me excited too. And then i did an investigation type of stuff to know what's inside the people. And believe me , it confused me and i am not able to understand what exactly people think.
After watching Delhi Belly, i was not at all impressed by the movie. As the movie is so much popular only because of the shitt that main leads and every second person in the movie is creating.
Only because there are so many 'galis' in the movie,on the basis of this only, koi movie kaise pasand kr sakta hai.
Its not the movie that people liked, its all that shitt, bad words, vulgarity,  that they loved, not only boys but also the girls with the same reason.
Then i thought to make a small investigation.
To humne paya ki agar real life mein koi aisi galiyan public places par de raha hota hai to girls ki reaction kuch aisi hoti hai "He is mad. Awaara hai, akal hi nahii hai, maa baap ne yahi kuch seekhaya hoga. Idiot, moron.Cheap, low class, chhichhora,  Bahut hi bura ladka hai. Dekho sharam hi nahi hai  kaise gandi gandi galiyan publically de raha hai, aiso ko to police station le jakr akal tikhane laga deni chahiye, , blah blah blah..
Jabki do ladke aapas mein baat kar rahe hain, ek dusre ko 'm******' , b****', ch*****, aise words ko helping verb ki tarah use kr rahe hain. Par aaspaas jitne bhi log hote hain unke dimag mein aise logo ke liye sirf negative image hi bnti hai aur jo ki banni bhi chahiye b'coz publically they are not good for environment.. Fir chahe kisi Metro mein khade hokr aap BC MC kr rahe ho ya kisi market mein khade hokr ya fir kisi chaat wali dukaan pr khade hoker, bad words always put bad impact.
In this movie also , kain baar Ch**** jaise word ka baar baar use kiya gaya, jo kuch jyada hi over lag raha tha. Shayad Mr. Amir Khan ne logo ko achhe se study karne ke baad hi aisi movie banayi that he was damn sure that even girls like this movie too. Aur aisa hua bhi, most of the girls loved the movie aur jinhone nahi dekhi thi wo sirf isliye dekhne ke liye excited ho gayi kyunki movie mein duniya bhar ki gandi galiyan aur bure words use kiye gye hain. Wooww, what a turn on factor to watch this movie, girls !!!
Ab jab wahi cheez big screen par aati hai to sabhi log usse enjoy karte hain . They jus love to hear ch*** after every single dilog, ma****, behn**** again and again. And its not like ki aap akele baith kar dekh rahe ho aur aisi language enjoy kar rahe ho, its about aap around 100-200 audience ke beech baithkr enjoy kar rahe ho, so its a type of public place.
Agar movie bhi hai to iska matlab ye to nahi ki bad language and words apna meaning badal dete hai. Ma****,  ma***** hi rahega , chahe Imran bole ya koi apke samne wali seat par baitha ek stranger.

So basically i only want to know if you (especially girls) really love that stuff in reel life then why you pretend that 'you not'  in your real one.
If i dont like choclates that simply means i am not gonna eat it whether a stranger gonna offer me one or some celebrity. How could one just hate eating choclate when a starnger or relative or friend offers, and the same person is then saying i jus love eating choclates, when offered by some celebrity.
Means, whats that !!!!, i just cant understand.

Why show different from outside when we are a different personality inside.
The only question in my mind (especially for girls) is ----  "What's Inside ?"


Monday, May 16, 2011

The Mawing Night

Hi Guyz,
I am Amaan Kashyap, 24 yrs, cool, fun-loving, kabhi hua krta tha. Life ko jyada serious na lene wala aur fikr ko dhuyein mein udane wala bnda tha main. Ek private company mein job krta hun aur ghar se duur akela hi apne choote se flat mein masti se jeeta hun, Ya ye kaha jaye ki jeeta tha. Us raat ke baad na hi meri zindagi normal hui aur na hi main khud.

Zindagi mein kabhi kabhi aisa lagta hai jaise sab kuch khatam ho gya. Kuch log isi darr se jeena bhool jate hain , kuch pagal ho jate hain aur kuch suicide kr lete hain. Meri zindagi ki ek raat jaisi raat kisi ne apni zindagi mein nahi bitayi hogi. Wo raat meri zindagi ki sbse bhayanak raat thi, us raat mein pal pal marr raha tha aur na chahte huye bhi wo sab ho raha tha jisse soch kr bhi insaan pagal ho jaye aur fir yhi pal pal uske dimag mein aaye that:
                                           "I am goin to be finished now".

It was dusky Saturday evening. The clock was ticking around 6 o'clock.
Sara din company mein kaam krke kaafi thakawat mehsus kr raha tha.  Pichle 48 ghanto mein main sirf 3-4 ghante hi so paya tha. Bahut buri tarah neend aa rahi thi, mujhe bas ek jagah chahiye thi jahan mein gir jaun aur wahin so jaun. Friday night shift krne ke baad jab saturday morning shift karni padti hai to life looks like a living hell. Aur wo saturday night mere liye sach mein living hell banne wali thi iska mujhe bilkul bhi andaaza nahi tha.
Company se nikalte hi maine market ki taraf gaadi ghuma li.

Saturday- 6 o'clock Evening

"Yar ek Codeine dena." , sar dard se fata ja raha tha to socha ki flat mein jane se pehle medicine le lun.
"Sir kitni tablets dun."
"Filhaal to ek hi", meri aankhein buri tarah band ho rahi thi.
"Kitna hua...??"
"Kitna huaa..??"
Shop pr bheed kuch jyada hi thi, wo akela hi sbko handle kr raha tha shayad isliye meri awaaz nhi suni.
"Ary yar tu ek tablet ke paise kaat le na pehle.", thoda sa gussa tha meri awaaz mein.
"Laaiye sir 3 Rupees huye aapki tablet ke".
Maine 100 ka note uske aagey kr diya.
"Sir khulle de do, mere pass change nhi hoga", usne duur se dekhte hi bol diya.
Mera dimag ghuum raha tha aur main jald se jald wahan se nikalna chahta tha.
"Sunn tu ye 100 ka note rakh , main baad mein aaker tujhse change le lunga."
"Theek hai sir aap kal subah aaker change le jana. Par kal sunday hai isliye hum kuch der ke liye hi shop kholenge. Aapko cell number deta hun ruko, kal aane se pehle ek baar call kr lena ki shop khuli hai ya nahi".
"Ary yaar jo krna hai jaldi kar, mera sar ghoom raha hai."
"Ek min bas inka bill kaat dun fir aapka hi kaam krta hun", shopkeeper ki bhi majboori thi akela hi sab ko sambhaal raha tha.
 "Apna phone number to atleast apni shop ke uper hoarding pr print krwa lo. Ek phone number ke chakker mein 5 min ho gye mujhe khade".
"Ary sir, kaun faltu ka kharcha krein hoarding-woarding mein, waise bhi roz roz thodi na aate hain aap jaise customer jinhe number dena pde. Ye lijiye ye hai mera number."

Maine uski parchi jeb mein daali , gaadi start ki aur full speed se flat ki aur chal diya.

6:45 pm

Finally mein apne flat ke darwaze tk pahunch hi gya. Jaldi se door open krke, seedha jakr bed pr gir gya aur within 2 sec main gehri neend mein tha.

8:15 P.M

Zor se ek dhamaka hua aur meri gehri neend bhi kb tuut gyi pata hi nhi chala. Bahar road par shayad kuch hua hai. Main fatafat khidki ki aur dauda aur neehce road pr nazrein daudai.
Oh shitt, neeche ka manzar dekh kr to meri aankhen jo thodi thodi bnd bhi ho rahi thi , wo bhi khuli ki khuli reh gyi.
2 cars aamne saamne se takrayi thin. Mujhe nhi lagta ki dono drivers mein se ko bhi bacha hoga. par ye kya unme se ek car reverse hui aur tezi se aagey nikal gyi. Isse pehle main kuch samjh pata jo dusri car thi uske ander se mujhe khoon road pr behta hua dikha. Mera flat second floor pr tha isliye maine lift ki bhi wait nhi ki aur stairs se hi bahut tezi se neeche ki aur dauda.
Neeche pahunchte hi dekha ki car ka darwaza bhi tuut gya tha aur usi taraf se khoon bhi beh raha tha. Main jaise hi nazdeek gya to maine expect bhi nhi kiya tha ki mujhe driver seat pr ek ladki milegi itni buri haalat mein. Wo bahut buri tarah injured thi pr saansein abhi bhi chal rahi thi. Uska poora chehra khoon se ranga hua tha aur agar isi raftaar se khoon behta rehta to usko bacha paana mushkil tha.
"Hey, kya tum meri awaaz sunn sakti ho," maine uske gaalon ko thapthapate huye poocha. Par wo concious state mein nhi thi. Maine uski gaadi ka number note kiya, ye delhi ki number tha.
Maine tabhi hospital call kiya "There is an emergency here, in frankin road aprartment, K-1, plz send the ambulance fast."
"Ok, we are sending, but what is your name sir?"
"Ok Amaan, we'll be there within 15 mins. You just stay there and wait."
"Look , 15 mins gonna be too late, she is severly injured, try to come fast".
"Ya, the ambulance is on its way. You do one thing. try to stop her bleeding. Give her a first aid and try to tie the bleeding parts till the ambulance reach".
Ab mujhe kuch samjh nahi aa raha tha, ki karun to kya karun. Fir mujhe yaad aya ki room pr kaafi bandages padi hain, main bina ek pal bhi der kiye uper ki aur dauda.

Room par pahunchte hi maine sabhi almirahs chhaan maari pr bandages kahin mil hi nahi rahi thi.
Tabhi meri door bell bji aur jaise koi bell pr hath rakh kr hath uthana hi bhool gya ho

8:35 PM
 Aur maine bhi gusse mein jaise hi door open kiya to samne police thi.
Thank god aap log aa gye, dekhiye wo bahut buri tarah injured hai aap usse jaldi se hospital le jaiye. Waise maine ambulance ko bhi call kr di hai, wo bhi abhi pahunchne wale hi honge.", maine ek hi saans mein ye sb bol diya aur inspector mujhe aise dekh raha tha jaise usse kuch samajh hi na aa raha ho.

"Are you Amaan Kashyap?", inspector ka pehla swaal yhi tha mere liye.
"Yes inspector."
"Hume aapke flat ki talaashi leni hai."
Uske muh se aisa sunn kr main kaafi shocked hua.
"Whattt !!!, mere flat ki talaashi?? Par kyun."
"Kyunki hume pata chala hai ki aapke flat mein kisi ka murder hua hai."
"Whattt, what are u saying inspector.Aapka dimag to kharab nahi ho gya. Neeche sadak par ek ladki marr rahi hai aur aap aaker aisa mazak kr rahe hain.", mujhe najane kaise achanak hi itna gussa aa gya.
"Kaun ladki, kiski baat kar rahe ho tum.", inspector ke is sawaal ka jawab bhi mere paas tha.
Main usse apne room ki khidki ke paas le gya aur usse ishare se neeche dekhne ko kaha.
"Neeche jhankar dekhiye inspector, abhi abhi wahan 2 cars ka accident hua hai, aur wahan ek ladki bhi dikhegi jo zindagi aur maut ke beech jhool rahi hai".
Inspector ne bina koi pal gawaye khidki se neeche ki aur jhanka aur 2 min tk wahin dekhta raha. Shayad jaise mujhe wo nazara dekhne pr shock laga tha , ab inspector ko bhi wahi shock laga hoga.
"Kyun inspector dekh liya na yahan koi murder nahi hua balki ek accident hua hai, aapko kisi ne galat information di hai".
"Ohh, I see, tum sahi keh rahe ho. Yahan accident hi hua hai aur wo bhi itna bura accident ki na to wahan koi car dikh rahi hai na hi koi ladki aur na hi kisi ka khoon baha hai. Sahi mein bahut bura accident hua hai.", inspector kaafi serious tha aur uski ye baat sunnkr main pehle se bhi jyada serious ho chuka tha.
"Kya baat kr rahe ho inspector, wo wahin to hai neeche, dhyan se dekho road pr.", maine duur se hi inspector ko fir se ishara krke neeche dekhne ko kaha.
"Maine toachhi tarah se dekh liya hai Mr. Amaan, mujhe lagta hai ki tumhe ek baar achhe se neeche dekh lena chahiye.", dobara dekhe bina hi wo inspector itna confident tha ki ab to main bhi khidki ki taraf tezi se badh raha tha.
Aur neeche dekhte hi jaise mere pairon ke neeche se zameen khisak gyi ho. Neeche sab kuch normal tha, na hi koi car khadi thi na hi wo khoon mein lathpath ladki aur na hi kuch aisa lag raha tha ki wahan koi accident bhi hua hai.
"Inspector, abhi 10 mins pehle wo yahin thi, maine khud usko dekha tha, uski car buri tarah se damaged thi, maine usse baat bhi ki par wo unconcious thi, beleive me inspector. Main khud samjah nhi pa raa hun ki ekdum se wo kahan chali gyi.", itna to main us accident ko dekhkr nahi ghabraay tha jitna ki ab wahi cheez na dekh kr ghabra raha tha.
"Kya main jaan sakta hun ki aapki saari almirahs aur kapde yun bikhre kyun pade hain Mr Amaan?", inspector ne meri baaton ko ignore krke apna swaal mere aagey rakh diya.
"Main us ladki ke liye bandage lene aya tha. Wahi dhoondh raha tha , isliye sabhi kapde idhar udhar ho gye".
"To fir aapko bandage mili ya nahi", inspector ne badi utsukta se poocha.
"Nahi inspector pata nahi kahan rakh di, aur abhi dusre room mein dhoondhne ja hiraha tha ki aap aa gye", maine saaf saaf sb bta diya.
"Ohh Agr aapko bandage nahi mili to ye aapke hath mein kya hai", inspector ne mere hath ki aur ishara krte huye kaha aur meri aankhen fati ki fati reh gayi, sari bandages mere hath mein thin.
"Bas bahut drama ho gya Mr. Amaan, ab sach sach batao yahan kya hua tha", inspector meri koi bhi baat sunne ke mood mein nahi tha aur isse pehle ki main kuch bolta uska ek constable zor se cheekha
"Saab khoon, khoon saab", uski tez awaaz ne hum dono ke kaan khade kr diye aur hum washroom ki aur daude.
Aur wahan jakr to jaise main behosh hone hi wala tha. Saamne bath'tub mein ek ladki ki laash padi thi.
"Inspector main nahi janta ye kaun hai yaahn par kaise aayi.", main samajh nhi paa raha tha ki aakhir ye sab ho kya raha hai. Aur wo inspector har baar ki tarah is baar bhi meri ek bhi nhi sunn raha tha.
"Saab lagta hai kisi ne iska gala kaatkr iska murder kiya hai", constable aur inspector mein guftgu shuru ho gyi.
"Ae Bishanva, laash ko bath'tub se bahar nikal aur seedha kr, chehra to dekhein iska , aakhir hai kaun ye".
Aur jaise hi unhone us ladki ki laash ko seedha kiya, mujhe ek aur shock laga.
"Oh shitt, ye to !!!! ye to wahi hai." , mere zabaan ladkhada rahi thi.
"Kaun wahi ??", inspector ka agla sawaal.
"Wahi, jiske liye main bandage lene aya tha. I mean isi ka to accident hua tha neeche. Par ye ye yahan kaise aa gyi?" mujhe apni aankhon pr vishwaas nahi ho raha tha.

"Saab saab idhar aao, ye dekho..", bedroom se awaaz aayi is baar.
Jo scene main wahan dekh raha tha mujhe khud ki aankhon pr vishwaas hi nhi ho raha tha.
"Saab inke bed ke neeche se ye khoon mein ranga chaku mila hai aur inke takiye ke neeche se ye white color ka kuch powder bhi mila hai.", constable ke hathon mein chaku aur wo white powder dekh kr main bhochakka reh gya.
"Ary na to ye chaku mera hai aur na hi maine kabhi aisa koi powder hi liya hai. Ye cheezein meri nahi hain inspector.", mere hi flat mein pichle 2 ghnto mein mujhe aisi aisi cheezein mil rahi thi jinko kabhi maine dekha bhi nahi tha.
"Bas bahut ho gya, ab jo bhi kehna sunna hai police station jakr krna. You are under arrest.", inspector ne hathkadiyan nikalte huye bola.
"Aur ab tumhara blood test bhi krwana padega, mujhe shakk hai ki tum drugs lete ho aur is waqt bhi tumne drugs li hain, tumhari aankhon se saaf saaf pata chal raha hai."
"What the hell main nahi karwaunga koi blood test  and you cant arrest me like this without arrest warrant", maine chalne se mana kiya.
"Tumhe shakk ki binah pr arrest kr rahe hain, and i can definitely do that Mr. Amaan aur agar tum bekasoor ho to blood test se darr kyun rahe ho. Agar kuch na hua to tumahri begunahi mein hi help krega ye tumhari".
Uski baat bhi sahi thi, jab maine kuch kiya hi nahi tha to main darun kyun. Aur maine blood sample de diya.
Inspector fir constables ki taraf muda " suno, tum log achhe se pure flat ki tafteesh krlo. Jitne bhi saboot mile sab ikathhe krlo aur laash ke aaspaas jitni bhi cheezein hai wahan se fingerprints lena mat bhoolna. Ye case to main aaj raat mein hi solve kr dunga.", aisa bol  kar jb wo muskura raha tha to aisa lag raha tha jaise wo mujhe jaankr is case mein fasana chahta hai. Isse pehle ki main kuch samjh pata , hathkadiyan mere hathon mein thi aur main jeep mein.

9:45 pm

"To ab tum mujhe sab sach sach btaoge ki aakhir kahani kya hai , hua kya tha, aur kyun mara tumne us ladki ko", police station mein inspector ki awaaz ab aur tez gunjne lagi thi.
"Kitni baar kahun , maine koi murder nahi kiya, main nahi janta kaun hai wo.", gusse mein tilmila sa gya tha main.
"Achha to tum usse nahi jante !! To aisa lagta hai ki uski laash ko tumhara washroom pasand tha, isliye khud chalkr aayi aur wahan leit gayi.", inspector meri baat samjhne ki koshish hi nahi kr raha tha.
"Dekhiye inspector meri baat dhyan se suniye, main 5:30 bje apne office se nikla tha aur medicine lekr seedha apne flat mein jakr so gya. Uske baad ek dhamake ki awaaz ne mujhe utha diya aur jab maine bahar dekha to 2 cars ka buri tarah se accident hua tha. Uske baad kya hua main aapko pehle hi bta chuka hun.", maine apni sari kahani ek baar fir uske samne rakh di.
"Agar ek min ke liye ye maan bhi lein ki wo khoon tumne nahi kiya to wo laash tumhare flat mein aayi kaise. Tum to akele rehte ho na apne flat mein to fir tumhare siva aur koi to aata jata nahi hoga,", inspector ki baat mein bhi logic tha, main khud hairaan tha ki aisa kaise ho sakta hai.
Tabhi inspector ke table ke uper pada phone zor zor se bjne laga.
Tring-Tring, Tring-Tring..
"Hello, inspector Vaghmare here".
"What !! , Are you sure. Theek hai reports lekr jaldi police station pahuncho".

"Haan to Mr. Amaan, abhi thodi der pehle main keh raha tha ki agar main maan bhi lun ki tumne ye murder nahi kiya to . Par afsos ki baat ab ye hai ki main ab ye bhi nahi maan sakta ki ye murder tumne nahi kiya".
"Main aapka matlab nahi samjha inspector.", main inspector ko samjahne ki koshish kr raha tha.
"Jo chaku tumhare bed ke neeche se mila hai aur jo powder mila hai , jispe hume shakk hai ki wo drugs hain " usse forensic department bhej diya gya hai aur uski report abhi 2 ghnte mein aane wali hai. Ab drug report aur  fingerprint report aane par sab kuch saaf ho jayega. Abhi 2 ghanto  mein pata chal jayega ki us chaku pr kiski ungaliyon ke nishaan hai".
Ab mera sar aur bhi fata ja raha tha.

11:45 pm

2 ghante beet chuke the aur jiska sabko besabri se intezaar tha wo time aa hi gya tha. Finger print reports aane hi wali thi.
Tabhi tez kadmo ki awaaz ne sbka dhyan room mein enter krte huye us constable ki aur kheench liya jiske hath mein forensic report wala envelope tha.
Envelope hath mein aate hi inspector bade maze lekr usse khol raha the "Lo Amaan ji aapki kismat mere hathon mein hai, ab dekhna ye hai ki is paar ya us paar".
Isse pehle ki wo envelope kholta, ek constable duur se hi cheekhta hua aa rha tha "Saab saab, ye jo powder mila tha inke bedroom se chaku ke paas pada hua iski bhi report aa gyi hai forensic lab se." , aur ek aur envelope thama diya usne inspector ke hath.
"Wah, ab to 2-2 envelope hain, dekhte hain ki kaun sa envelope kya kismat lekr aya hai".
Aur ek ek krke wo dono envelope khol chuka tha. Main uski aur dekh raha tha , kaafi relaxed expression the jaise kuch hua hi na ho.
"Dekha maine kaha tha na is murder se mera koi lena dena nahi hai, now leave me.", main bahut jald in sbse nikalna chahta tha.
"Wait..... abhi itni jaldi bhi kya hai.. Kaafi time se wait kiya hai aapne bhi in reports ka to result to sunte jaiye.", inspector ki aankhen chamak rahi thi.
"Aapki dono reports positive aayi hain Mr. Amaan. Chaku pr ungliyon ke nishaan aapki ungaliyon ke nishaano se match krte hain aur according to forensic department ye powder Cocaine hain", inspector ne mujhe installments mein jaise zor ke jhatke diye the.
"What the hell, aisa ho hi nahi sakta , jab maine ko khoon kiya hi nahi to meri ungaliyon ke nishaan kaise aa sakte hain us chaku par,. Inspector try to understand mujhe koi fasane ki koshish kar raha hai. Maine aaj tak beer nahi pee to main drugs kya lunga. Main pichle 48 ghnto se nahi soya hun isliye meri aankhen aapko aisi lag rahi hain. Come on, somebody is playing a game with me. Aap samajhne ki koshsh kyun nahi kr rahe.", main buri tarah se bokhla chuka tha.
"Ohh, to aap pichle 48 ghanto se soye nahi isliye apki aankhonmein jo nasha hai wo drugs ka nahi neend ka hai. Hahaha. achha joke tha Mr. Amaan. Par aapko ek news deni to baaki hai. Aapki blood sample mein isi Cocaine ki presence hai, That means ki is waqt aap Cocaine ke nashe mein hain", ye sunkr mere chehre ka rang ud chuka tha. Koi bahut bada game khel raha tha mere sath aur ab main buri tarah fans chuka tha.
"Ye nahi ho saka inspector , maine sirf medicine li hai wo bhi headache ki. Shayad mere blood sample mein usi ke ingredients mile hon."
"Aisa kuch nahi hai, report mein saaf saaf likha hai ki tumne sirf cocaine li hai aur koi medicine ke ingredients tumhare sample mein nahi mile. Ab to sabhi saboot yahi ishara kr rahe hain ki tumhi ne ye murder kiya hai. Kyun kiya ab ye tum mujhe btaoge".
"Ary main keh raha hun na maine koi murder nahi kiya aur na hi koi drugs li, main poore hosh mein hun aur ek ek cheez bta sakta hun ki 5 bje ke baad se kya kya hua. Mujhe achhe se yaad hai office ke baad main seedha medicose ki shop pr gya , ek 3 rupees ki codeine li , uske paas change nahi tha t usko 100 rupee ka note diya aur kaha ki baad mein change le jaunga aur fir usne kaha ki kal le jana, pr sunday hai aur shop thodi der ke liye hi open hogi , apna number diya aur main... Ek minute ek minute, inspector. Aapko yakeen nahi ho raha na meri baat ka, mere paas us shopkeeper ka number hai, aap abhi usse call krke puch lein mere baare mein ki main usse medicine lekr gya tha ya nahi. Ye lijiye uska number".
Aur inspector ki ungaliyan phone number dial krti chali gyi aur phone bhi speaker par rakha gya tha taaki sabhi sachhai ko sunn sakte.
"Hello , Inspector Vaghmare bol raha hun. Tumse kuch pooch-taachh krni hai. Kya aaj shaam ko 6 bje koi sar dard ki medicine lene aya tha, jisne tumhe 3 rupees ke badle 100 rupees diye the."
"Nahi sir, aisa to koi bnda aaj shop par nahi aya. Aur 6 bje koi kaise aa sakta hai. Aaj dopahar 2 bje ke baad se to shop hi open nahi ki humne. Ghar pr koi function tha na isliye.", shopkeeper ki baat sunkr mujhe mere kaano pr yakeen hi nahi hua aur maine phone apni aur krke usse gusse mein.poocha " Ary main tumhari shop pr aya tha shaam 6 bje . sar dard ki goli lene, Maine 100 rupees diye the tumhe. Tumne kahan tha ki kal ko change le jana aur fir ye number bhi to tumhi ne mujhe diya tha".
"Ary kya baat kar rahe ho bhai saab, koi galat fehmi hui hai aapko, aaj to dopahar se hi shop bnd hai aur kal bhi bnd hi rahegi. Aur mera cell number to meri shop ke uper hi likha hua hai, koi bhi wahan se note kr sakta hai."
"Jhoot....... jhoot bol rahe ho tum, maine khud dekha hai tumhari shop pr koi hoardind nahi laga jispr tumhara number likha ho. Tumhi ne kaha tha na ki kaun faltu ka kharcha kre in cheezon pr."
"Aap kya bol rahe ho sir, ek kaam karo khud jakr dekh lo abhi , meri shop pr mera number likha hua hai ya nahi.", aur shopkeeper ke itna bolte hi inspector ne phone kaat diya.
"Ye jhoot bol raha hai inspector", mere chillane se poora police station gunj utha.
"Chillao mat Mr. Amaan. Bas ek tumhe chodkar sabhi yahan jhooth bol rahe hain. Tum hi to ho ek satyawadi. Kyun??", inspector ki awaaz mujhse bhi jyada gunjne lagi.
"Haan haan main sach bol raha hun. Nahi yakeen hota to chalo mere sath aur khud dekh lo ki wahan hoarding hai ya nahi".
"Chalo, tumhari ye khwahish bhi poori kr dete hain. Par ek baat samajh lena agar is baar bhi tumhari baat jhooti nikli to tumhe mujhse koi nahi bacha sakta", inspector ki dhamki pr mera itna dhyan nahi tha jitna main apne aap ko begunah saabit krne ki soch raha tha har pal.

12:30 AM

Jaise hi hum jeep ki taraf badhne lage to ekdum se meri aankhon ke aagey andhera sa chhane laga, mujhe chakker sa mehsus ho raha tha. Abhi tak main yahi soch raha tha ki neend poori na hone ke karan main weak mehsus kr raha hun. Par ab mujhe bhi lag raha tha ki jaise koi nasha sa chadhne laga tha mujhe. Kahin wakai mein to maine Cocaine nhi li thi. "Main bhi bevkoof hun , kuch bhi sochta rehta hun. Maine aajtak cocaine kaisi hoti hai ye bhi nahi pata, aur khaani to bahut duur ki baat hai. To ho kya raha hai mujhe. I am not getting , what the hell is happening". Main khud se hi sawaal kr raha tha aur khud hi ko jawaab bhi de raha tha. main sach mein pagal ho raha tha.

kab jeep us shop ke aagey pahunch gyi pata hi nahi chala.
"Lo Mr. Amaan , aa gye aapki shop par", inspector ne mujhe shop ki taraf ishara krte huye kaha.
Aur meri nazar seedha shop ke uper lage us hoarding par gyi jahan shop ka naam aur number tha.
"But how could it be possible, abhi shaam tk to ye yahan nahi tha", meri aankhon ko vishwaas nahi ho raha tha.
"Bas bahut ho gya, har baat jhooti saabit hui hai tumhari. Koi bhi hoarding itni jaldi tayar hokr nahi lg sakta aur paint bhi itni jaldi nahi sukhta Mr. Amaan. Ab tumhe is case mein koi nahi bacha sakta . You Are Finished, completly finished. Ab aur kuch hai dikhane ko ya sunane ko??", inspector ki awaaz kaafi bhari ho gyi thi.
"Chalo ab gaadi mein baitho", inspector meri baju pakadte huye gaadi ki taraf chal diya.
"Gaadi, wait inspector. Mere paas us gaadi ka number hai jis accident mein us ladki ko maine dekha tha", mere liye abhi ek darwaza aur khula tha.
"What rubbish, jab wahan koi accident hua hi nahi to tumne kis gaadi ka number note kr liya. Ab ek aur nayi kahani banane lage ho. Par is baar aur bevakoof nahi bana sakte. Chup chaap chalo police staion.", inspector meri kisi baat ko sunne ko tayyar nahi tha.
"Main police station jane se mana nahi kr raha , par aap samjhne ki koshish kyun nahi krte ki maine koi murder nahi kiya. Main is case mein fasaya ja raha hun , kisi ne bahut badi game kheli hai mere sath. Please aap mera sath do inspector. Bas ek baar aur mauka do mujhe begunah saabit krne ka", maine inspector ko convince krne ke liye poori jaan laga di thi.
"Theek hai , ye last chance hai. Car ka number btao".
"DL05192", ye number maine apne hath mein hi likh liya tha.
Constable ko kehkr usne us gaadi ki details mangwayi. Hum police station wait kar rahe the ki tabhi constable aa gya details lekr. Aur jab inspector ne details dekhi to is baar uski aankhen fat rahi thi.

"Kya hua inspector, pta lag gya na kiski gaadi hai wo. Kaun thi wo ladki. Uska address bhi mil gya hoga.", maine question ki line laga di thi uske samne.
"Lo tum khud hi padh lo details", inspector ne file mere aagey kr di.
"Aur jab maine us file mein car owner ka naam dekha to mere pairon ke neeche se zameen khisak gyi. Naam tha "Mr. Amaan Kashyap".  "
Address bhi mera hi tha.
Par ye kaise ho sakta hai, maine to aisi car kabhi khareedi hi nhi.
Ab inspector ki nazrein mujhpr aur kadi ho gayin thi.
"Tumahri har baat jhooti saabit hui hai abhi tak aur sabhi baatein yahi ishara krti hain ki tumne hi ye murder kiya hai. Ab ya to khud sab sach sach bta do ya fir hume 3rd degree use krni padegi. Aur uske baad tumhari zubaan yahan khulengi ya fir aankhen hospital mein"., inspector ka kada rukh badhta ja raha tha.
"Aap chahe mujhe yahan rakhein ya hospital, main tab bhi yhi kahunga ki maine ye murder nahi kiya",meri awaaz shayad wahan ki deewaron ke alawa aur koi nhi sunn raha tha.
"Ek minute, ek minute inspector. Mujhe yaad aa raha hai. Maine hospital call ki thi ambulance ke liye. Aap abhi hospital bat krke pata kr lijiye. Unhone hi mujhe first aid dene ko kaha tha.", ek halki si roshni ki umeed abhi baaki thi.
"Tumne police ko samjh kya rakha hai , jaise chaho apni ungaliyon pr nachate rahoge. Abhi tak tumhari ek baat bhi sahi saabit nahi hui. Ab ek aur nayi kahani tayyar krli tumne", inspector apna dnda table pr patakte huye chhillaya.
"Rukiye , main abhi baat krwata hun aapki unse", aur fatafat keypad pr meri ungaliyan daudne lagi.
"Hello", dusri taraf se awaaz aayi.
"Dekhiye abhi thodi der pehle maine yahan call krke ek emergency entry karwayi thi ambulance ke liye. Aap please us call ke records aur information jo maine di thi , wo check kr sakte hain abhi", mera gala bhi ab to sukhne laga tha.
"Wait, wait, wait... Aap kiski baat kar rahe ho. Kahan number milaya hai aapne.", dusri taraf se kaafi unexpected response aya.
"Ary ye St. Teresa hospital hi hai na. Abhi to maine yahan call ki thi".
"Dekhiye aapko kisi ne galat number diya hai, ye koi hospital nahi ye St. Jorge Marchandise Church hai. Sorry to say my son, this is wrong number", aur udhar se phone kaat diya gya.
"Hello hellllooooo, listen to me. Kyun aap sab log jhoot bol rahe hain. Kyun sab ajeeb behave kr rahe hain. Aakhir bigada kya haimaine tum logo ka.", dusri taraf se phone ktne ke baad bhi main yuhin phone pr chillata raha par har baar ki tarah is baar bhi koi sunne wala nahi tha.
"Inspector ye jhoot bol raha hai, main pichle 6 mnths se isi hospital se apne friend ka migrane ka ilaaj karwata raha hun. Aur doctor se isi number par hi main appointment leta hun. Abhi last week hi maine wahan visit kiya hai. Ye jhoot bol rahe hain inspectorrr.", main poora paseene se tar-batar tha.
"Haan haan saari duniya jhooti hai bas ek tum hi raja harish chander paida huye ho. Ye dekho sabhi hospital records, inme kahin bhi is naam ka hospital hai hi nahi. Kam se kam naam to wo liya hota jo exist bhi krta Mr. Amaan".
"Nahi aisa nahi ho sakta, aap chaliye abhi mere sath , main aapko dihata hun, ye is sheher ka sbse bada hospital hai. Aapko kaise nahi maloom iske baaer mein. Aap abhi chaliye inspector.", maine apni taraf se poora insist kiya.
"Dekho, bahut bevakoof ban liye hum aur bahut bana liya tumne. Ab hume majboor mat karo apni aukaat pr aane ke liye aur khud hi sab kuch sach sach bta do", inspector apni seat se uth gya.
"Kitni baar kahun , ye khoon maine nahi kiya, nahi kiya ye khoon maine. Bas ek baar, meri aakhri khwahish samjh kr hi sahi, pr ek baar aap mere sath us hospital chaliye inspector. Please.", mere paas gidgidane ke alawa koi aur chara bhi nahi bacha tha. aur shayad is baar bhi inspector ko kuch laga ki wo meri baat maan gya aur hum hospital ki aur badh chale.

1:15 AM

"Stop, stop inspector, yahi wojagah hai jahan hospital hai.", maine aaspaas ki buildings dekhte hi bta diya.
"Agar jagah yahi hai to hospital kahan hai Mr. Amaan ?"
Aur jab main jeep se bahar nikla to mera dimag fatt sa gya. Wahan pr hospital ki building hi nahi thi aur jo building wahan thi , wo thi "St. Jorge Marchandise Church" .
Ye koi mazak nahi tha, aur na hi main pagal hua tha. Ye meri zindagi ka jeeta jagta bhayanak sapna tha. Aur ab main buri tarah se tuut chuka tha aur meri har umeed bhi tuut chuki thi.
Mujhe kuch pata nahi chal raha tha ki aakhir kuch hi ghanto mein sari duniya aur haqeeqat badal kaise gayi bas ek hi baat ab mujhe pata thi that
                                                    "I am goin to be finished now".

                                                             END OF PART - 1

Saturday, June 5, 2010



"Doctor plz kisi bhi tarah , kuch bhi karke use bacha lo."
"Hum poori koshish kar rahe hain, aap plz shant rahiye, Condition bahut critical hai. Patience rakhiye plz".

Aur dheere dheere jaise hi uski dhadkanein dheemi hoti ja rahi thi mujhe har wo lamha yad aa raha tha jo uske sath juda tha...

        College life ka pehla din. Bahut Excitement aur thoda darr bhi lag raha tha, ragging ka. Khud ko independent mehsoos kar raha tha. No uniform , koi timings ki restrictions nahi, ek alag hi duniya mei aa gya tha. Charon taraf fresh chehre the. Class shuru hui aur kaafi achha laga, ye schools ki classes se thodi different thi. But abhi abhi school se nikle the to kaafi hadd tak discipline hamare sath tha aur hum college classes ko bhi school classes ki tarah hi seriously lete the.. Fir jaise jaise din guzre hum puri tarah college students ban chuke the, no discipline, no classes, regular bunks, mauj masti, daily parties.. Class mein ek chehra tha jo hamesha mujhe apni aur kheenchta tha. Kabhi baat nahi ki thi ya kaha jaye kabhi mauka hi nahi mila kuch baat karne ka. Par fir ek din dil ne suggestion di " ki bhaiya mauke milte nahi, banaye jate hain". To chal diye ek din notes ka bahana bnakr uske paas " Excuse me, Hii, actually i was absent yesterday , kal jo economics ka lecture laga tha uske notes chahiye the". "Wo abhi to mere paas nahi hain, main kal la dungi", she replied. "OK, thanx", aur main chal diya.
                                    "KAVYA", jitna khoobsurat naam tha usse kain zyada khoobsurat thi wo". Lagta jaise aasmaan se pari uter kar is zameen par aa gyi ho. Uska chehra taazi kali ke samaan khila khila sa rehta. Uski aankhen aisi thi mano kuch na keh kr bhi sab kuch keh jati . Uske komal laal, phulon se nazuk hothon par jab hansi aati to aisa lagta jaise zindagi muskura rahi ho. Wo jab chalti to hawayein chalti thin, wo jab rukti to mano waqt thm sa jata. Uske kaale lambe baal aise lagte jaise baadlon pr kaali ghatayein chha gyi hon aur barasne ko tayyar hon. Uski har ada mein ek masti thi. Wo hoti to lagta jaise sab kuch hai aur uske na hone se aisa lagta jaise ye duniya hi nahi. Uske chehre ki chamak ke aagey suraj ki chamak bhi feeki padh jati. Use dekh kar lagta ki usse apni sari khushiyan de dun aur uske sare gamo ko apna bna lun. Uske chehre ki masumiyat, wo bholapan, wo nazakat, wo haya , mujhe har baar uska bna jati thi...Kuch Aisi thi meri "KAVYA".
                                          Next day ka besabri se intezaar tha, isliye nahi ki notes chahiye the, isliye ki us se fir se baat hogi. Saari raat karwatein badalte nikli, neend ka to dur dur tak koi namo nishan hi nahi tha. Ye raat itni lambi kyu hai, guzarti kyun nahi, hey bhagwaan bas aaj ke liye raat sabse chhoti kar do..Jaldi se 8 bja do , plz plz plz, itni bechaini to mujhe paida hone ke baad nahi hui jitni aaj ho rahi thi.
                                    Par bhagwaan ne der se hi sahi par sun li, aur suraj ki pehli kiran se pehle hi main ekdum perfect tayyar hokr ready ho gya. Aur sheeshe ke aagey khada hoker rehearsal karne laga  ki kis tarah se us se baat krun jisse best se best impression jaye, I am sure us din to bechara aaina bhi dukhi hoker tutne ko ho gya tha. Aadhi bottle deo ki pure jism pr aise gira di jaise koi pehelwaan kushti karne se pehle pure sharir par teil ki maalish karta hai. Jabki mujhe deo se allergy hai, but pyar, ishq, mohabbat mein hosh hi kisko rehti hai. Puri tayyari ke sath ek ghanta pehle hi college pahunch gaya. Ab aur sabr nahi ho raha tha, kab 8 bjenge aur college khulega, ji haan main bahar parking mein hi baitha college ka gate khulne ka intezaar krta raha. Wahan ka watchman bhi mujhe aise dekh raha tha jaise maine kisi ka khoon kar diya ho aur uske paas saza maaf krwane aaya hun. Nyways ek ek pal, ek ek saal ki tarah guzar raha tha aur barso beetne ke baad aakhir 8 bj hi gye aur college khul gaya. But meri musibat abhi yahin kahtam nahi hui thi, hamari class to 8:30 pr shuru hoti thi, yani ki abhi adha ghanta aur wait karni thi. Chalo jahan 9 ghante 38 min 45 sec wait kiya wahi adha ghanta aur sahi.. Apni class mein gaya aur ek baar fir rehearsal shuru kar di , "Hii yar wo notes laye aap". Agar wo layi hogi to bolegi,  "haan ye lo, actually maine sabhi kuch to note nahi kiya par jitna kiya hai wo main le ayi". "Thanx, to main agar ye tumhe kal tak de dun to chalega",.... hmmm, aisa bolna theek rahega. "Theek hai par plz kal yaad se le aana, mujhe bhi padhne hain", aisa hi kuch kahegi fir wo. "Ya sure", halki si smile de dunga..
                            Aur agar na layi to wo kahegi "oh sorry , main lana bhool gayi". Fir Uske samne udaas sa chehra bnaunga jaise mera sab kuch lut gaya ho aur fir udaas si awaaz mei kahunga "Its Ok,  kal le aana". Aisa karne pr senti ho jayegi.
Aise hi rehearsal karte karte kab class ka time ho gya pata hi nahi chala.
Aaj ka din bahut khaas tha...Class mei students aate gye, seats full hoti gyi, Meri nazarein par kisi khaas ke liye class ke darwaze par tiki thin. Dil bol raha tha ab ayegi ab ayegi. Sabhi aa chuke the, even ki teacher bhi. Lecture shuru ho gya. Par main abhi bhi darwaze ki taraf hi dekh raha tha, tabhi 'door' par hulchul si hui aur mere dil mein bhi. 'Door' khula to dekha ki dusra koi teacher tha. Fir mujhe bahut gussa aya  "pata nahi bachhon se college sahi time par kyun nahi pahuncha jata, discipline naam ki koi cheez hi nahi hai, pata nahi kyun studies ko seriously nahi lete aajkal ke students". "Arey ye kya main kab se aisi baatein krne laga, kamaal hai mujhe aakhir ho kya raha hai, itna utawala to main kisi ke liye kabhi hua hi nahi, mujhe samjhte der nahi lagi ki main us se really mein love karne laga tha". Ek ek karke sabhi lectures lagte rahe aur main isi aas mei baitha raha ki shayad wo ye lecture lagane aa jaye, uske chakker mein maine is semester mei pehli baar ek din mei saare lecture lagaye the. Sabhi lecture over ho chuke the aur meri bechaini 100 guna badh chuki thi, ab fir se sadiyon lambi raat, hamari mulakaat ke beech mei aane wali thi. Kyun bnayi bhagwaan tune ye raat, yahin soch raha tha us waqt main aur sath hi sath usper bhi gussa aa raha tha "Waise to daily aati hai, ek lecture bhi nahi chhodti, aur aaj chhutti karke baith gayi, ghar hi baitho na kya zarurat hai college aane ki, ye ladkiyan hamesha apne baare mei hi sochti hain, dusro ki feelings se koi matlab nahi inhe, ek number ki matlabi, selfish, dhokebaaz" , aur pata nahi kya kya dimag mei chal raha tha us waqt.
Aag-babula hua college ke gate tak pahuncha hi tha ki ek frnd ne awaaz dekr rok liya " Arey yar tujhe pata chala", thoda excited sa lag raha tha. "Abe kya pata chala , kya ho gaya ", main to pehle se hi frustrated tha, to thodi frustration uspr bhi nikal di.
"Yar wo Kavya ka accident ho gaya aaj, shes serious, Chandigarh PGI refer kiya hai usse"..
"O shit, aisa nahi ho sakta yaar", mere galey mein mano awaaz hi nahi thi aur sharir mei jaise jaan hi nahi bachhi thi. Main wahin se bus stand ki taraf bhaga aur seedha chandigarh ki bus pakdi...Pure safar mein bas yahi dua kar raha tha ki usse kuch na ho, wo bilkul theek ho jaye. Agar maine apni zindagi mein aaj tak ek bhi achha kaam kiya ho bhagwaan to usse kuch na ho. Main khud ko bebas sa mehsus kar raha tha. Hospital pahunchte hi pata chala ki wo operation theatre mein hai aur peechle 2 ghante se uska operatoin chal raha hai. Uske ghar wale sabhi wahan the, "kaise hua uncle ye sab", Kavya ke father se pucha. "Beta subah college ke liye nikali thi, fir thodi der mein phone aya ki kuch notes lene bhool gayi hai, ye wahi notes the jo wo sari raat baithkr banati rahi. Usne kaha "unhe table par nikal ke rakhein, main lene aa rahi hun", aur fir aate waqt ek car se uska accident ho gya, aur fir......" uncle ke ansun chhalak pade...." , kavya unki ikloti ladki thi, usi mei unhe apna beta, apna pura parivar dikhta tha aur aaj wo hi zindagi aur maut ke beech jhul rahi thi".
                                                     Tabhi operation theatre ka door khula aur doctor bahar aaya "I am sorry, condition is still critical, kuch keh nahi sakte, aap usse mil sakte hain". Meri aankhon mei aansun the, "kyuuun...., aakhir kyun bhagwaan mujhse wo log chheen leta hai jinhe main pyar karta hun". Sabhi parivaar waale kavya ko ghere khade the. Tabhi doctor ne sabko ek ek krke milne ko kaha..Main darwaze pr khada usse dekhne ki koshish kar raha tha par himmat nahi ho rahi thi usse aisi haalat mein dekhne ki. Usne mujhe dekha , shayad usse yakeen nhi hua ki main uske paas hun, usne halka sa hath ka ishara krke mujhe paas bulaya , Main ro raha tha aur kuch keh nahi pa raha tha. Main uske paas khada tha, uske pure chehre par pattiyan bndhi thin, wahi chehra jise har roz subah sbse pehle aankh khulte hi dekhna chahta tha aaj usne wohi chehra mujhse chupa rakha tha. Uske wo komal honth aaj pathher se bejaan pade the, fir dheeme se usne mujhse kaha "kitna time laga diya tumne notes mangne mein". Uski ye baat main samajh nahi paya. Fir wo boli  "main kab se intezaar kar rahi thi ki tum kab aaoge kisi bahane se ek din mere paas, aur notes bhi tumne us din ke mange jis din main bhi absent thi". Par aaj jab tum aaye to main ja rahi hun. Meri ankhein fati ki fati reh gyi "to tum bhi absent thi us din, to wo notes sari raat tum mere liye prepare kar rahi thi......o shit kitna bevkuf tha main jo samjh hi nhi paya, Plz Mat Jao, main sara din tumhara class mein wait karta raha, kitna intezaar karwaya tumne aur ab ruk bhi nahi rahi ho. This is not fair.",  main apne pyar ko narazgi mein jatane ki koshish kar raha tha....
Meri aankhon se aansu rukne ka naam hi nahi le rahe the..

Aaj mujhe pata chala ki maine kitni badi galti ki, apne pyar ka izhaar karne mei maine itna waqt laga diya ki aaj waqt hi nahi bacha..Par ab aur nahiiii....
                                       Maine uska hath thama aur bol diya "I LOVE YOU".... Maine aaj tak ye lafz kisi ko nahi kahe the aur na hi kabhi socha tha ki kisi ko kahunga, par aaj main khud ko rok nahi paya.  Uske hothon pr ek dheemi si muskaan aayi, main intezaar kar raha tha uske reply ka. Par uski muskaan wahin thm si gyi. "Doctor, kya hua Kavya ko", main chhillaya. "Oh my god, Heart beat is collapsing", doctor replied.
"Doctor plz kisi bhi tarah , kuch bhi karke use bacha lo.", main chahkr bhi kuch nhi kr pa raha tha.
"Hum poori koshish kar rahe hain, aap plz shant rahiye, Condition bahut critical hai. Patience rakhiye plz".
Fir achanak samne screen pr mujhe uski dhadkanein dheemi hoti dikhayi di. Aur kuch hi seconds mein ek stright line beep ke sath chal rahi thi. "Doctor kya hua, what happened..??", mere chhillane mein mera darr chupa tha..
"I am Sorry, She Is No More", he replied. Aur jaise meri dhadkan bhi wahin ruk si gyi.

                                                       Kabhi kabhi hum sari zindagi rehearsal mein hi nikal dete hain par ek time aisa bhi aata hai jab hume perform karne ka mauka hi nahi milta. Zindagi se zyada unpredictable cheez aaj tak mujhe nahi mili. Har pal , har lamha, aane wale pal ke sath jooda hua hai. Hum kabhi kabhi sochte reh jate hain aur zindagi ek din fir sochne ka mauka hi nahi deti. Jab hum hote hain tab waqt nahi hota , aur jab waqt hota hai tab hum nahi hote. Kaash wo pal waapis aa jayein, college ka wo din waapis aa jaye jb maine pehli baar Kavya ko dekha tha aur usi waqt usi ka ho gya tha , taaki main usi waqt usse keh sakta apne dil ki baat. Par na hi kabhi guzra waqt waapis laut kar aaya hai aur na hi kabhi khoyi hui zindagi. Is waqt ne meri zindagi hamesha ke liye badal di.
                          Ab har raat usi bechaeni ke sath karwatein badalta hun, sochta hun ki bhagwaan ne ye raat aakhir bnayi hi kyun, subah suraj ki pehli kiran se pehle hi ekdum perfect tayyar hoker sheeshe ke aagey rehearse karta hun, har baar ki tarah aaina bhi dukhi hoker tutna chahta hai, pr shayad ab usse bhi iski aadat si ho gyi hai, fir 7 bje college ki parking mein gate ke khulne ka wait karta hun, ab to watchman bhi nahi ghurta, 8 bje class mein jaker us se kaise baat shuru krunga practice karta hun, 8:30 bje sabhi class mein aane shuru ho jate hain, main darwaze ki taraf dekhta rehta hun ki wo ab ayegi ab ayegi, sabhi aate hain sabhi jate hain, main sabhi lectures lagata hun ki shayad wo ye lecture lagane aaye, par wo aaj bhi nahi aayi... kyun log college mein bunks marte hain , kyun itne indisciplined hote hain, kyun time se college nahi aate...Har din usi tarah shuru hota hai aur har raat waise hi dhalti hai. Sab kuch chal raha hai par main aur mera waqt thm sa gaya hai. Main sara din kavya ka usi tarah intezaar karta hun aur Fir wo mujhe daily evening mein milti hai aur dheeme se smile karti hai, aur uski wo muskurahat wahin thm si jati hai......

Main aaj bhi Kavya ki us pyari si smile ke baad wale reply ka wait kar raha hun...Mujhe yakeen hai wo ek din zarur laut kar ayegi, mera hath thamegi aur kahegi  " I LOVE U TOO..."

Hey Guys hope u like this story.. Actually i hav promoted this story as my own love story.. But it ws just a part of promotion.. When I was writing this story, i decided to promote it as my own love story..

All  the  characters  in  this  story  are  fictious  and  any  resemblence  to  actual  person,  living  or  dead,  is  entirely  coincidental...
I  love  to  write  love  stories  with  tragic  endings  but  my  sis  suggested  me  to  write  a  happy  ending  love  story... Next  time,  i'll  try  for  it... For  now... bbyeee.... n  stay  tuned  for  my  next  saga....

Buy Books From on Tragic Love Stories :

Clover : The Tragic Love Story of Clover and Henry Adams and Their Brilliant Life in America's Gilded Age
Even the Vultures Have Moved On (A Tragic Love Story)

Thursday, April 8, 2010


Hi Frnds, wazzup, hope its all gud , i know you are busy and i also know ki kahan kahan busy ho...

Kuch friends is waqt orkut pr chipke hain to kuch facebook pr, kuch twitter pr busy hain to kuch bechare study material search kr rahe honge google pr, kuch bematlab ki tension lekr baithe honge aur kuch matlab hote huye bhi bina tension ke baithe honge, kuch paise kamane mei lage honge i mean job pr honge, to kuch bank mei daakka daalne ki soch rahe honge, yar multi-talented dost hain mere kuch bhi kar sakte hain.....Bt as usual i am absolutely free . So i have decided to share some interesting moments, friendship and life at NIT. Friendship apne aap mei ek broad term hai jiski kai definitions milengi. But in simple words , dosti wo cheez hai jo aapko hansna seekhati hai, aagey badhna seekhati hai, gam mei bhi muskurana seekhati hai, har pal ko jeena seekhati hai, girkar phir sambhalna sekhati hai, in short, life mast dhang se jeena seekhati hai.

College ke 3 saal kab khatam huye bilkul pata hi nhi chala pr jb mehsus hua ki waqt guzar chuka hai aur ab raahein badalne wali hain to ye rishta aur zyada gehra ho gaya.
Samajh nahi aata students college aur studies ko itna zyada seriously kyun lete hain ki life ka sara maza hi kho dete hain. Theek hai yar main ye nahi kehta ki tum padho mat, bt kitabi kidey (book-warm) ban jao aise bhi mat bano. Jitna hum apne aas paas k living example se seekh sakte hain utna books mei se nahi , ye mera apna experience hai. Ye batein main isliye keh raha hun kyunki humne kabhi marks ko itna seriously nahi liya. Hum class mei tab enter krte the jb saari class teacher k lecture ko samarpit hoti thi. Ki farak painda hai yaar chahe lecture shuru se attend karo ya beech mei aaker , humari samajh mein to tab bhi kuch nahi aana tha. Maza to tb ata tha jab exam sir pr hote the aur hum 1 din pehle syllabus puch rahe hote the aur notes ikathhe kar rahe hote the. Kyunki hame pata hota tha ki ratte (cramming) humse lagne nahi jo kuch padhna hai samajh kar padhna hai aur jo ek baar samajh aa gaya to dobara reading ki bhi zarurat nahi.

Aur mere to dost bhi itne intelligent the ki kai baar to maine book mei se bina pade hi sessionals diye. Unse hi topics discuss kr leta tha aur wahi bana bana kr likh dena aur asli maza to tab aata jb kabhi kabhi main unse jyada score karta tha, really mei unki shakal dekhne wali hoti thi, i always love that expressions.. Attendance ki to shuru se hi confusion rahi. Waise to hum classes lagate hi nhi the aur jo lagate bhi the to usme itni late aate the ki attendence ho chuki hoti thi, pr kabhi ek baat samajh hi nhi aayi ki jin classes main hum regular rehte bhi the usme bhi attendance short kaise ho jati thi. Nyways teachers ne kabhi attendance k kaaran koi problem nahi aane di, really very supportive teachers, beshak har semester mei short hoti thi.

Last year mei to hamare halaat aur bhi bigad gaye the. Ek to class mei late entry marna aur wo bhi khali hath jaise shadi mei aaye hon. Ek baar to mam ne keh hi diya " very good ek to late ho aur uper se khali hath , tum log karne kya aate ho class mei ". Hum bhi besharamon ki tarah, jb tk mam sentence complete krti , apne apne aasan pr viraaj-maan ho chuke the. Ek baar to hadd hi ho gyi jb dusre teacher ne bhi ek din puch liya , "tumhare registers kahan hain, where are your registers" , to arun, my frnd (1 idiot out of 3) class ki taraf hath krke kehta "mam vivek (2nd idiot) ke paas hain" . Jab mam ne vivek k liye class mei nazar dodaaii to pata chala janaab aaj absent hain, is bnde ki hamesha hi timing kharab rahi hai, jiske kaaran humari jaan pr ban aati thi, pr kya krein yaar.... jaan hai apni. Kher jhut to pakda gaya pr uske baad bhi hum baaz nahi aaye. Daily kuch na kuch hota rehta tha, kuch intentionally aur bahut kuch unintentionally.

Apni to life ka ek Simple sa formula raha hai " jaise bhi jiyo mast jiyo". Tension kisi bhi problem ka solution nahi hai bcoz tension itself is a very big problem.

Hamesha muskurao, khushi mei khush hona to ordinary si baat hai , extra-ordinary baat to gam mei bhi khush rehna hai. Jhooti hi sahi, smile to lao yaar chehre pr, atleast tumhe dekhkar kya pata kisi aur ke chehre par muskaan aa jaye. Hamesha aise khush raho ki bhagwaan bhi confuse ho jaye ki yaar ye bnda itne gam mein bhi khush kaise hai aur usse bhi ek din tumhe khush dekhne ki aadat si ho jaye. Its difficult but not impossible. Try It..

This is just a single page of book of our endless memories. NIT days were our golden days and always be. We enjoyed every moment of life. Each and every day was a surprise package for us. We really miss that moments we shared together. Today we are placed and are in different cities , far away from each other, lekin aaj bhi hamari shararatein , hamari badmaashiyan aur wo bewkufi bhari harqatein NIT mei zinda hain aur hamesha rahengi...
And am sure NIT mei har class mei idiots zarur honge jaise hamari class mei the...
OOpps i hav introduced you two idiots (Arun and Vivek), now you are guessing whos the third one...That third idiot is Me (Aman)...

 Agar aapko meri class ke darshan krne hain aur hamare masti bhare lamhe dekhne hain then watch it on

Luv Yea Miss Yea guys...Take Care and Gud luck for your future....

Buy books on friendship on :
Sterling Silver "The Story of Friendship is Written on the Pages of the Heart" & "I am a Better Me Because of You" Reversible Two-Charm Pendant, 18"

Friends Forever (Step into Reading)

A Friendship That Flames

Saturday, March 27, 2010

Love ---- It Really Exists and Can Happen More Than Once....

Signing In : Aman

Hlo frndzz,
                                                Today am goin to write about love -- jo har kisi ko life mein ek na ek baar to zarur hota hai , ya kuch logo ke according ye sirf ek hi baar hota hai ,  pr hota zarur hai....means LOVE truly exists.
                                                  Actually kain log hote hain jo love, pyar, ishq aur mohabbat jaise lafzon mein vishwaas nahi rakhte , iska sbse bada example tha main. Ya you heard it right , i said "tha" not "hun". Main ab tak yehi socha karta tha ki pyar ek course ki tarah hai , agar aap interested ho to admission le lo nahi to dusri stream mein chale jao. But jaise jaise life mature hoti jati hai aisa feel hone lagta hai ki shayad hum kahin na kahin galat the. Love is not optional , its compulsary. Aap karna chaho ya na karna chaho kabhi na kabhi ho hi jayega aur aapko pata bhi nahi chalega that you are attending the class of love.
                                                          But wait a sec, Dont get me wrong here, main aisi baatein kar raha hun to iska matlab ye bilkul nahi hai ki mujhe pyar ho gaya hai, no wayzzz. Main ye isliye likh raha hun ki mujhe feel hone laga hai kisi ko bhi kahin bhi aur kabhi bhi ho sakta hai. Aur jab mujhe lag sakta hai aisa that means ye cheez really mein exist karti hai , kyuki mujhe kisi bhi cheez ke liye convince karna is really a tough job. Pehle main bhi sabhi ka mazak udaya karta tha ki pata nahi kaise ek unknown person ke liye munde ya kudiyan itne attached ho jate hain. Par kabhi kabhi aisa hota hai ki aap kisi aise person se milte hain jise aap achhe se na jante huye bhi unki care karte hain , unke sath jab jab hote hain ek achha insaan ban jate hain, waise aap honge achhe insaan isme koi shaqq nahi but what i mean is ki kuch buraiyan to sabhi mein hoti hain , nobody is perfect, but agar wo buraiyan bhi kisi person k sath reh kar khatam ho jaye chahe us waqt ke liye hi sahi, you feel yourself a perfect one aur wo feeling byaan kar pana thoda sa mushkil hai.
                                                  I heard so many people saying " pyar-vyar kuch nahi hota yaar, ye sab free bando ka time pass hai". Hmmm...that means jo log aisa bolte hain unhe bhi agar kuch waqt tak free kar diya jaye to koi guarantee nahi ki unhe pyar nahi hoga, aur agar time pass bhi hai to kya hua it means ye exist to karta hai na, aur waise bhi saari zindagi to insaan busy nahi rehta na yaar.  Kya pata aap 70 ki age mein free ho jao aur tab aapko pyar ho jaye, who knows.
                               Mujhe ye to bleve ho gaya ki love exists but abhi tak ye clear nahi hua ki kya ye sirf ek hi baar hota hai. According to my present views  " main nahi manta ki pyar sirf ek baar hota hai , pyar kain baar ho sakta hai, kyuki jisko aap pasand karte ho wo agar aap ko chhod kar chali jaye ya chala jaye, aur uske baad koi waisa hi ya usse bhi achha person life mein aye to aapko dobara pyar ho sakta hai, u cn never deny this fact". And its damn true.                    

                 Iske peeche bhi ek reason hai, jab aap kisi ko like karte ho to aap apna daayra (circle) aur focus sirf us person tk hi simit (सिमित) kar lete ho. Us waqt aapke saamne koi usse bhi achha person aata hai to aap usse ignore kar dete ho, shayad tabhi kehte hain ki pyar andha hota hai, lol.... But jab aapka break up ho jata hai, jo ki ek usual si baat hai, tab aapko lagta hai ki saari duniya hi aisi dhokebaaz hai, rascal hai, buri hai, gndi hai, kamini hai etc etc. Aap sochne lagte hain ki saare boys/girls aise hi honge...But gimme a break, tumne koi ram ya sita ko nahi chuna ki jisse dhokha khakr tum saari duniya ko usse compare krne lag jao. May be you hav chosen the worst person on this planet aur fir us se ditch hone ke baad tum sabhi ko us jaisa samajhne lagte ho. Aur yahi wo point hai jahan par pyar shabd badnaam ho jata hai.  I mean come on " grow up". Agar hum kaafi time se kisi ke sath relation mein hain aur khush hain (ya the), aur fir hamara breakup ho jata hai that means ki humne ab tak ek dusre ko jana hi nahi ya pehchaan hi nahi paye. In simple words hum dono mein se koi ek fake tha ya hum dono hi fake the. Aur uske baad pyar shabd se nafrat karna really a childish thing. Means aapne apne liye coffee bnayi aur aap sugar dalna bhul gaye jab aapne taste kiya to aapka reaction tha "chiiii , kitni buri hai , i jus hate coffee, main aagey se kabhi isse muh nahi lagaungi/lagaunga". arey yar coffee mei sugar aapne nahi daali to taste to bura aana hi tha na isme life mein kabhi dobara coffee nahi peene waali to baat hi nahi. Agli baar jb banao to sugar achhe se dalna taaki jo galti pehli baar ki ab dobara na ho. Ya fir ye bhi ho sakta hai ki aap bade chaav se coffee bnate ho , proper sugar, proper powder, evrythin perfectly, pr jab aap taste karte ho to you really feel bad ki kitni buri bani hai, its bcoz coffee ka brand hi poor tha i.e. its not your mistake , u try your best from yourside but its the coffee thats of poor quality.Next time coffee ka brand zara dhyan se choose karna. I think you understand what i mean. Aur dusri coffee itni tasty bhi ho sakti hai ki aap pehli ka taste hamesha ke liye bhool jayein...Samjhe..
                                          Aur maine ye bhi suna hai ki pehla pyar kabhi nahi bhulta , but main kehta hun ki jitni bhi baar pyar karoge kabhi nahi bhuloge. Its gurantee ki tum na sirf pyar bhula paate ho, even ki tumhare saare crushes , saari love in first sight stories, ye sab tumhare mind ki hard disk memory mein save ho jati hain which is non-volatile ofcourse. Ye feeling hi kuch aisi hoti hai ki tum chaho to bhi puri tarah se bhula nahi pate, haan waqt ke sath sath thodi dhundhali zarur ho jati hai.
                                            So in my terms , love is like a virus jo kabhi bhi tumhe attack kar sakta hai aur hamesha k liye hang bhi kar sakta hai...Aur ye kisi ke bhi through enter kar sakta hai, friends ke through ya kisi unknown ke through. To Kb tak bachaoge apne aap ko isse , kabhi na kabhi to effected ho hi jaoge aur dukh ki baat to ye hai ki sabhi antivirus isse detect to kar lete hain par koi remove nahi kar paata...Be safe from LOVE.

         I can proudly say that presently i am safe, i am still not effected.......ARE  YOU...........????
Signing Out : The One

Buy a book on love from :

Love Happens 
It Could Happen to You 
Love Never Dies 

Saturday, March 13, 2010

Save Tigers , Save World.....Be Humans.

Hi guys,
                Today as we all know that global warming is the major concern all over the world, but theres one more issue that cant be ignored at all...Yes, you are right, i am talking about tigers. Today theres only 1411 tigers left in india which is really a major issue threatning the ecosystem. As we know that we are the part of a life cycle including trees, insects, animals or in short a part of an ecosystem. If any one of this part got missin then the entire chain will break..And we know that broken chains never move on the cycles. Tiger is our national animal. And we are losing it day by day. 1411 is a negligible figure. We feel proud that the entire world knows us as tigers. And howll it feel when the next generation will ask "what was tiger, how did it look, Did they really exist". Thats really a shame for us, we cant save our national game, cant save our national animal and even cant save our identity. No, we are indians and we can do anything. So lets take a step towards this. Save tigers, save your identity and save the world.  
                                                                    Dont hunt them, Save them...
                                                                                            Be Humans..